"Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love." -- Rainer Maria Wilke

_______So, for this post, I have a few intentions. I bet more will present themselves when one thought falls in love with another, but for now, I have two. And I'll go from there.

_______The first, and potentially the most important intention and purpose that one ever has, is to tell everyone that I love them. I am aware that not everyone that I love reads my blog. But even if you aren't all of the people that I love, you're still here, and you're still listening. I hope you know that really, I am talking to you.
_______We can't accurately measure love, ever. We try to. "This is my friend, Sarah. This is my best friend, Steven. But this is my best best friend, Alexa." The measurement of love that we feel other people want to give us makes us decide just how much we think it is alright to give back. You say hi to the people who always wave at you in the halls. You give people hugs if they are the type who open up their arms all of the time to give you hugs. You don't look at people if you feel like they try to avoid eye contact with you.
_______But really, that's not a measurement of our love. It's amazing just how much we govern our lives based on how we feel we stand with another person. Now, if I knew that I'd follow through without getting arrested or molested, I would make the goal to love people, and show it, no matter my standing with them. It may well get a bit insane, though, so I'm trying to make another goal: To show people a little more love than I have before.
_______"To show people a little more love than I have before." I'm not completely sure what this means yet. I think it's one of those things that you just learn little by little as you do it.
_______A lot of this has actually been spurred on by just observing people. I really want to understand people. That person who has emotions burning them down like a wildfire, but barely has any smoke on the outside. That person who is really nice and funny, but just comes on a little strong. That person who wants to turn their life around so that they can feel good about it, but is brought down by their friends sometimes. That person who never feels beautiful, so always looks to confirm it. That person who....
_______I want to know you. And I want you to know me.
_______Leading on from the topic of goals in life... I am going to be a junior in about two weeks. Not like, "Aw, wittle Rachel Junior is just gettin' dis tawl!" However much I sometimes wish it was. But... Junior. As in, "Make a wish, you're in eleventh grade in 2011." Does time shock anyone else? Or is it just me?
_______I hear it gets worse when you get older. I felt old three years ago. And now three years ago sounds young. o.O
_______So, I figured I'd tack another goal list for this next school year onto this post.

1. To show people a little more love than I have before.
2. Win a trophy in fall marching band! I am so excited. I am so proud. I am a Grizzly. :-)
3. To learn to procrastinate just enough that I can get to bed before midnight thirty. Preferably to actually do my homework when I should actually be doing it instead of watching Fringe or listening to (surprise) 80's music.
4. Get another 4.0. I've heard from everyone so far that 11th grade is a whole lot harder than sophomore year... If so, I have my challenges cut out for me.
5. This will be over soon, but... to finish my summer homework... "I have confidence in sunshine! I have confidence in rain!"
6. Win a trophy in winter guard! :-) To always stay in touch with Eva!
7. Read all of John Green's books. And finish all those books I've started (though I'm sure there will be more)... Dang. Finish Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince especially. :P
8. Actually get involved in the activities NHS and MESA do this year. I stink at it, ohh, yes I do.
9. Make Lise say "Rachel, you're the only one who could get away with that," about my clothes even more often. X)
10. Apply for scholarships. D-: Look into colleges. D-: Freak out. D-: Stop freaking out because I know it's not productive. :-| Freak out anyway. D-:
11. Get a good score on mah ACT.
12. Learn to cook better things so I'm not living on noodles with parmesan and toast for the rest of my life.
13. Sew a dress. I've gotta confess, I'm fashion obsessed.

(A billion days later)
14. Fix my schedule! It's embarrassing to have to do it twice. :-P

Have a great day! ^_^